Drudge Headlines Re-Interpreted..

1) 2020 VISION? Michelle Obama to appear on ‘ELLEN’…

M.O. looks forward to performing a Walter Mondale impression circa 1984

 

2) Kansas intern confidentiality rule: What happens in lawmaker office stays there…

Grope-a-Dope

 

3) Man dies after sucked into MRI machine…

When the cure is worse than the disease

 

4) UPDATE: Wynn Fallout Ripples as Republicans Seek Distance…

Grope-a-Dope / Part Deux

 

5) Humanoid To Replace TV News Anchor…

Dan Rather returns

 

6) Red Lights Flashing for Republicans Before Midterms?

No

 

7) Kochs plot $400M blitz…

Soros plots $400m blitz…now we’re even and smart Americans will make informed choices like they always do

 

8) Half-ton of undelivered mail found in postman’s garage…

Sometimes the Postman doesn’t even ring once..

 

9) UPDATE: CA City Gets Ready For Universal Basic Income…

The ThoughtMarauder hates to say “I told you so,” but, “I told you so.”

 

10) INDIANS To Abandon Chief Wahoo Logo…

I hope the Cleveland Native Americans win the pennant this year..although I’m offended there are no actual “native americans” on the team..

 

11) APPLE value drops $45 billion in week on fears of X demand…

Uh-oh..down to our last $850 billion dollars..better cut wages

 

12) New ISIS Video Threatens USA: ‘Now Time to Rise, Slit Their Throats’…

7th century losers threatens 21st century winners with 7th century behavior

 

14) RIO RAUNCHY: Topless revelers take to streets in gear up for Carnival…

The ThoughtMarauder needs to check the veracity of this headline up close and in person..I’ll report back my findings in 3 weeks….maybe ;-7

**Originally Posted on 29 Jan 2018**

Author: ThoughtMarauder

Cavalier, bomb-thrower, provocateur, neanderthal, father, proud US Army Airborne veteran, proud American, lover of many things: God, country, family, baseball, Scotch whiskey, cigars, old-school jazz, dogs, Sinatra, watches, shoes and sunshine..

Leave a Reply